A tough decision
by sanctuary fan
Summary: Pike asked Lisbon to marry him and Jane finds the most inappropriate way to try to make Lisbon stay. Bad choice... M-rated just for safety.


**A tough decision**

**I know we've all been waiting for what happened at the end of season 6, but I was thinking about a change of pace so ignore Blue bird. Pike asked Lisbon to marry him and Jane finds the most inappropriate way to try to make Lisbon stay. Bad choice... So don't read if you think Jane is brilliant and a saint…**

Lisbon is really leaving and she still doesn't tell him. After all those years, after he brought her to the FBI, she isn't even going to tell him she's leaving. He is hurt, but tries not to show it. He has a smug smile plastered on his face every time he meets someone. He's good at hiding his feelings.

The evening before she leaves she comes to his house.

"What are you doing here?" he asks her

She looks at him trying to understand his emotions. She only sees anger. "I'm leaving tomorrow and I wanted to see if you're OK" she finally speaks.

"Why wouldn't I be OK?" he asks casually

"Because I didn't tell you I was leaving" her eyes reflect the sorrow in the sentence.

"Why didn't you?"

"I couldn't, Jane. I… I don't know. I thought you…" Lisbon just can't find her words.

"You thought I what?" Jane asks loving the way she looks when she is uncomfortable and she raises her shoulders. She has no idea what to answer. She doesn't even know what she expects of him, maybe to say something to her, something like he cares and he doesn't want her to go… or do something, hold her hand, look at her like there can be so much more between them… She can't say these words to him, because she can't admit she made a mistake with Pike… Finally she heads for the door to leave.

"Don't turn your back on me!" Jane orders and she frizzes. She turns to him startled by the sound of his voice and opens her mouth to protest. In that moment, Jane comes up to her and kisses her hard, catching her hands as she starts to push him away. He stops and looks at her. Her look is genuinely shocked. _Come on Lisbon, isn't this what you came for? _Jane is thinking. Lisbon takes a step back from him.

"What are you doing?" she asks him.

Jane comes closer to her and pushes her to the wall.

"Don't go!" he whispers and kisses her again. He doesn't feel a reaction from her so he opens her lips with his tongue and hears her moan. He feels her trying to escape his grip and stops.

_What the hell? _Lisbon asks herself the moment her back hits the wall. Jane's lips are on her lips; his tongue is in her mouth. She can't think, she just wants to breathe and free her hand. _Damn it, Jane, not like this! _

"Stop!" she finally manages to say. He's watching her, but her hands are still in his grip. "Let go of my hands!" she demands, but he doesn't comply.

"I need you Lisbon!" he whispers and places his lips on her once again. "Don't leave me!"

_Not like this! _It's all that Lisbon is thinking. Jane keeps on kissing her and finally lets her hands go so he can reach for her breasts. Sometimes she fantasized about this moment, but this is weird and rough and makes her uncomfortable. She really expected him to do something before she got to his place, but not like the way he is doing it to her right now.

"Slow down" she says and tries to stop his hands. "Jane! Stop!" she yells at him when his body forces her legs apart. She's a federal agent, she could easily break his hand, or overpower him, but she is stunned. He is trying to rip open her shirt and is actually hurting her.

"Jane stop! Can't you tell I don't want this?" she says. _Can't you tell you're breaking my heart? _she wonders silently. Jane acts like he doesn't hear her. Her shirt is open and Jane stops for a second to look at her chest. The adrenalin running through Lisbon is making her chest move up and down very fast. Jane finally looks at her eyes and doesn't like what he sees there. He can tell she is struggling inside and realizes that she isn't impressed with him right now; she is more likely to hit him or at least stick her gun to his face.

"Get away from me" Lisbon demands. He complies this time. She checks her shirt and ties it in a nod against her waist. Jane takes 2 more steps back.

"What were you thinking?" Lisbon finally breaks the silence. "Did you think I came for a screw before I leave? You jackass!" she's trembling and she hates it. "What's wrong with you?"

Jane stares at her opening his mouth to speak, but nothing is coming out. He really thought that kissing her, eventually having sex with her would prove his feelings to her. He really screwed things up. _Very perceptive of me! _He's thinking.

By now Lisbon is almost in tears. She's more angry than hurt, but foremost she is disappointed. That's what Jane believes of her, this is what she means to him. At least she can leave now without regrets. She buttons her jacket and leaves his house without saying a word.

_Stupid, stupid, stupid! You almost raped her, you stupid! _That's all Jane's mind can think. He is too stubborn to run after her, to beg forgiveness, to tell her he's out of practice on dealing to women close to him, actually, to tell her she is the only woman close to him. He just feels the taste of her lips and the smooth fabric of her bra. And he knows he won't feel them again…

Lisbon is driving now, tears running down her cheeks. She's angry and hurt. She feels dirty, not because Jane almost abused her, but because she would have slept with him if he had been gentle. The decision about Pike's proposal depended on Jane all along. Now, as Jane took her for granted and expected her to respond to his whims, she was angry for putting her future in the hands of a fool. She grabs her phone and calls Pike, her answer is "Yes".


End file.
